How I met my boyfriend on Google+.

This isn’t me and my boyfriend but you can totally pretend it is, I’m fine with that.

Google+ is great for posting stuff that you’re too embarrassed to post on twitter and facebook, since no one uses it. What is the sound of one hand clapping? Google+. Where do good statuses go to die? Google+. Where’s the best place to hide a dead body? Google+. And so forth.

So who would have ever thought that Google+ would help me find my boyfriend? Most people don’t even know what Google+ is. I explain that it’s like Facebook if no one used Facebook. You connect with people, post statuses, and you would use it to procrastinate if it weren’t so horribly boring.

But that’s not important right now.

My friend posted a status of a ridiculous iphone cover that looked like real sushi. I wrote about it on Hello Giggles, but that’s not what this story is about. And now I’m hungry. Why does everything bad happen to me? Anyway. He posted this photo of this sushi phone and I commented on how awesome it was and then found other awesome things on that website and posted those on his Google…circle…wall…whatever, as well.

Then a message from someone else popped up. Because Google+ is as dead as any graveyard, the bones of interactions past still remain. Here is exactly what I saw:

“Is this the Almie that went to Emerson for a little while back in ’03? I think I may know you.”

Rather than say something like, “No you must be thinking of another Almie who went to Emerson in ’03” I decided not to be a sarcastic jerk for once and responded that yes, it is the same Almie:

“You’l [sic] have to forgive me, my time at Emerson is a blur. Did we have the same classes or something?

 Fucking suave, Uncle Almie.

I want to add that my time at Emerson was very brief and very blurry. I was going through a serious depression at the time. We’re talking Kirsten Dunst, can’t bathe for herself, “It tastes like ashes” Melancholia depressed. I was there for one semester. I did manage to be pretty involved in the community. I auditioned for and got one of the two newscaster roles for the SNL Weekend Update type show EVVY Update to be aired on the Emerson school channel. We would report on what students were doing for the EVVYs which was some kind of student run award show for students and I don’t remember what EVVYs stand for or what we actually did but I do remember that Chloe’s dad was kind enough to film a “Congrats to the EVVY winners!” clip for the show, that I’m wondering if they ever used, and Chloe’s dad has a secret bathroom in his office, where the bathroom door looks like a wall and you don’t know it’s a door until he presses it in and then you’re like, “Holy shit, Chloe’s dad is Batman.”

But that’s not important right now.

I also managed to get on the writing staff of the comedy magazine. It was here that I met my friend Dave Horwitz — but I don’t remember us being friends at all. Years later we connected back in LA (via MySpace, MY LIFE IS THE INTERNET) and he told me, “Don’t you remember me? We were on the comedy magazine together.”

I blinked.

“…We sat next to each other every week.”

Blink.

“I saw you doodling pigs wearing top hats.”

“Oh yeah!! I remember those!”

My point is, I sat next to this guy every week for months and I didn’t remember him at all. This is important to the story. The story of how I met my boyfriend on Google+ not how I met Dave Horwitz on MySpace. That’s a good story too, but I kind of just told it. Oops.

So. My future boyfriend just told me that he remembered me from Emerson and I told him, basically, “Who the fuck are you?” [“Did we have classes together?”] He said:

“I don’t think so, actually. I think it was even vaguer than that. Like we were both commuter students and met at a commuter event or something maybe…”

I wasn’t a commuter student. Like, not even close. I decided it was time to kick this shit into full gear. It was time to take this to Facebook.

I contacted him on facebook and we exchanged flirty messages back and forth, the kind where I would be giddy to see that little “1” in my inbox and I would ask my friend Katie, “How should I respond??” and she would say something and I would ignore it and then do whatever I wanted.

So we arranged to meet. We met at a trendy wine bar on the border of Los Feliz/Silver Lake/Narnia where the bartenders had old timey barbershop quartet mustaches and the patrons were loud and recorded themselves having fun on their iphones. We had a wonderful first date, and I will tell this story at some point, if anyone cares.

A few dates later, he confessed that we had indeed met before. We’ve since determined that it was likely outside a showing of “Lost In Translation” near my dorm. Apparently, we stopped to chat and we even exchanged numbers. And I don’t remember this. By the time he called me, I had already dropped out and moved back to LA, which I told him on a message I left him. And again, I don’t remember any of this. But through the magic of the internet, we found each other again.

Aw you guys, right??

So without Google+ I never would have (re?) met this great guy. Thus, I can never leave Google+. I will go down with this ship.

How did you meet your sig other? Do you believe in fate?

Boom.

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64 thoughts on “How I met my boyfriend on Google+.

      1. Kate

        Also I’m making you a personal mixtape. But. I’m working my ass off until Christmas so it won’t be done until then. But it’s in the works!

  1. Nicole

    I met my boyfriend when he was drunk out of his mind, got lost, and wandered into my kitchen. Moral of the story: never lock your front door.

  2. Annie

    We were both on lots of drugs and (re)met at a party and recognized each other from class and we sat on a roof in Manhattan all night long jabbering about things that we thought sounded intelligent at the time but if I heard a 19-year-old utter them today I would smack them. Google+ wasn’t even an option because this was so long ago that after that night we actually kindled our relationship on AIM and used “The Facebook.”

  3. Gina

    So much awesome in this post! I’m happy for you!

    I met my boyfriend on OK Cupid a month before I moved to South Korea. I joined the site for fun– as a way to go on a few dates and have a few flings before I left to help pass the time. What I ended up getting out of it was an amazing guy whom I plan to move in with and marry after I move back to the states. It’s crazy to think that if I had never joined that site, I never would have met my future husband.

    Yes, I do believe in fate.

  4. Project 305

    Hashtags on Twitter. Someone followed and retweeted me after I used a very obscure hashtag. Found out we lived in the same town, had similar interests…we broke up after a month and a half. I work nights and we couldn’t make time for each other.

  5. Alison

    I met him my freshman year of college through a friend. I instantly had a crush – he was getting over his ex. I had to stop spending time with him because I couldn’t get over my crush. Two years (and a different boyfriend) later, I am scrolling through my contacts on my phone, and come across his name. I decide to send him a text. We texted all night, now we live together. It was totally fate!

  6. Erin

    I knew OF him my whole life. He graduated a year before me, was friends with my sister, lives around the block and “dated” one of my bffs for a while……oops! He is also my first boyfriend ever (I’m 22…loser) and I’m actually glad because I think he’ll be my only one. That sounds really lame and naive but whatever I know that it’s not. Suck it, judgers!

  7. Pingback: Fatalism on a Tuesday Morning. |

  8. allie

    Such a great story! and yes, I want to hear about the first date!

    I met my bf almost two years ago during a group outing to go see The Room. We ignored our other friends, sat next to each other and and yelled the same stupid joke at the screen (actor: “you cant leave him, he has a very good position.” me and bf: “yeah, ON TOP!”).

    After a few dates we confessed that we both had seen each other at other gatherings and thought the other one was cute but we never talked – a good thing because if we had talked earlier, we would have found out we were both still in previous relationships. We then found out that we’d been at A LOT of parties together without noticing each other and we had a lot of friends in common. One of my high school teachers even taught him too! Then, a few months after we started dating, I got a job at his work (not through him but through another friend I had working there) and my bf told me that even if we hadnt met yet, we would have then at work. So yeah, I kind of do belive in fate… with him at least.

  9. Miss Peaches

    I like your story. :) I met my boyfriend in high school – we were both in chorus, but neither of us were really the “chorus dork” type. We both developed huge crushes on each other – but he had a girlfriend at the time. Nothing ever happened – but he and the girlfriend broke up, leaving my 16-year-old self feeling terribly guilty, even though I had never done anything wrong. Eventually they got back together, he graduated, went off to college, and we stayed in touch mostly through AIM (ha!), long emails, and occasional group get-togethers with high school friends. Both of us have gone through pretty hellish relationships, but six months ago, seven years after we first met, we had our first kiss. And things have been magical ever since. :)

  10. Ashley

    I met my husband through MYSPACE! Remember that one? I was on my BFF’s top 8 (obviously) when she randomly became “friends” with a kid she went to high school with. He saw me on her page and sent me a message. We talked via Myspace, AIM, and phone calls for a month before meeting. We finally met up on St. Patty’s Day and we have been together ever since – almost 7 years now. Getting a boyfriend via social networking is definitely the way to go.

  11. Katie W.

    Hi!! I love, love LOVE your blog, and you! I’ve been following for over a year, but I’ve never commented before.

    So so happy for you! Love this story!

    I met my boyfriend on eHarmony. Our first date was on Halloween in 2009. We got sushi and then drinks afterwards, and at the end of the date, when he said he’d call, I said “yea right, I’ve heard that line before.” He texted me that night, and the next day, and he called me the day after THAT.
    Not sure if people know how eHarmony works, but they send you matches everyday and you can initiate contact with them if you want. He’s told me that he only had about a week left of his membership, and was just letting it run out because he’d had no luck, and I contacted him. I’m 28, and I’ve had my fair share of terrible relationships, so in the beginning, I kept having to pinch myself and say “OK, this is real” (I’m sorry, that is so cheesy).
    I definitely believe in fate. I always think “what if…. I waited a week to contact him…. I met someone else first….” but things so far have worked out pretty nicely…..annnd I’ve typed far too much.

  12. Rachel

    This post gives me faith in life again, or at least the possibility I will find someone special and/or be awesome enough to have a Jack Donaghy Secret Office Bathroom.

  13. Shelley

    This is the first google+ love affair I’ve read about and it makes me happy! I’m not huge into google+ but I’ve been eagerly awaiting the moment when I meet someone in real life who I’ve accidentally stumbled upon via google+.

    I believe in these sometimes odd and sometimes twisted fates though. I met my boyfriend last winter at a bar/club/music venue in the lower east side of New York (they call it, “Pianos”). This is not a bar I frequent and is not a bar I would ever opt into going to … except for the night I met my boyfriend.

    Two of my besties and I were out having post work drinks; work for all of us had been shitty, New York winters give us misplaced southerners seasonal affected disorder, and I had just gone through a shitty breakup. Maybe it was the three beers we’d had or fact that I thought we were all dressed cutely that day, I dunno but, I was struck to pull my friends and I out of our rut then and there. I talked them into going dancing… and as non-dancers we used our future phones to map the nearest dance hall. We paid a stupid cover, checked our coats, and danced like no one was watching because we knew we’d never see any of these people again.

    A drunken birthday girl inspired my sassy friend to beg the bouncer to kick her out or cut her off. Not wanting to be involved or associated with my friends burst of sass I danced my way from the situation to near a boy I’d been eyeing since we walked in. We danced a little, made out, I learned his name and that he was friends with the drunk birthday girl, got his number and made a date. We’ve been together since. My friends have yet to pull out of their ruts though.

  14. sal

    oh wow what an interesting story. go social networking! lol i met my partner when he was on holiday in my home country for 4 days. After that we kept in touch through facebook, visited him a few months later in England for what was supposed to be a weeks holiday turned into 3 weeks (don’t know how i managed to keep my job), he asked me to come live with him, few months later packed my bags and moved to England to be with him and now 3 and a half years later we are still living together and very happy. The End.

  15. Tony Archer

    My whole story is seriously more epic than How I Met Your Mother, but the INCREDIBLY abridged version is that when I was moving to Seattle, I posted on Myspace that I was moving there and asked if any of my friends knew of anyone who lived here. Only one person replied and directed me to two of her friends, one of them was a guy who I have remained very friendly acquaintances with since I moved here and the other was this incredibly gorgeous blonde girl who had an extremely done up Myspace page so I wrote her off as just another vapid Myspace whore. But…she was REALLY hot. So I sent her a few IMs and she didn’t say much, which just supported my belief that she was just a pretty girl who liked to flirt with boys online and didn’t really take anything seriously. We’d talked over a dozen times and I was still fairly certain that she didn’t even know my name.
    Then one day as we were talking I asked her what her favorite book was (fully expecting her to say “The Rules” or “The Devil Wears Prada” or something) and her response without any hesitation was “The Silence Of The Lambs”. I was floored. So from then on out, I realized that she had a brain and we became friends. We both dated other people and kept our separate lives and never met in real life, but for some reason something always told me that I should see things through with her. We talked more and I realized that I liked her. Then we talked more and I realized I was in love with her. And at some point in all of that, she came to those same conclusions about me (how this happened is a mystery of the fucking universe, I swear).
    So after literally YEARS of talking to eachother online and trying to actually set up a meeting (which NEVER worked out because the universe just didn’t want it to and SOMETHING would always come up on my end or on her end or on both and we’d have to cancel), we had our first date when we were already in love with eachother.
    And now, I can’t imagine spending a single day without her and I know more than anything in the universe that I’m going to marry her. I’ve got the ring and the plan and everything. Almie’s seen it. It’s red.

    Like I said, this is the EXTREMELY abridged version of this story. The events that lead up to me even being in Seattle in the first place are their own ridiculous series of serendipity and are the reason that I can say without any hesitation that I absolutely believe in fate.

      1. Tony Archer

        Like is said, there are so many interweaving parts of fate involved that it would take FOREVER to tell. But say the word and I’ll type it up. We both know how I enjoy ranting and talking about my girlfriend.

          1. Tony Archer

            Hahaha. I totally missed that you left this! Yes, she is! But she’s also pretty swell in pretty much every other way as well.
            I’ll work on the full story for you some time this week.

  16. Ali

    wait shut the fuck up did I know you went to Emerson??? because I went to Emerson….. not at the same time but I don’t even care.

    I’m glad the internet is pretty much your entire life because it’s also my entire life so….. this is the worst comment I’ve ever left on your blog

  17. Kpaige

    Your blog is HILAR, and I usually don’t comment, but I can’t resist this time.

    I was home over Christmas break last year where I know absolutely no one. no. one. So I do things like go to the movies with my dad. I walk into the movie theater and spot an insanely gorgeous man of the managerial sort. We are making a lot of eye contact. Like.. woah, this man is actually looking straight at me, and he is not looking away, ohmagah thisneverhappenstome..

    Movie is over. I walk out, and we lock eyes again. I turn around. He’s still looking. eeeeee!! (My dad is with me the entire time btdubs). I couldn’t let this go. I didn’t have his first name, but I did have the internetz. I straight up google the name of the theater + “manager,” and I found quotes from two different theater managers in the local newspaper from Harry Potter releases in 2007. I take those names to facebook, and found a profile that looked promising, but of course, I didn’t know for sure if it was him because his profile pic was Fry from Futurama :/ After much debating with myself, I send him a message asking if he was the red-headed theater manager in a purple shirt/tie. After TWO DAYS he responds. It was him. I asked him out. Then he asked me out. Then we went out.. a lot :)

    We’re no longer together, but we’ve remained friends for almost a year now. It’s def a fun story to tell in the right circles :)

    1. Almie Rose Post author

      Thank you so much for commenting!!

      That story warms my heart and makes me smile. That is so great and further proof that the internet is magic. I’m glad you remained friends! And nice sleuthing.

  18. Christina

    Google+ is that awesome bar that no one goes to because NO ONE IS EVER THERE. But it’s superly duper attractive. If I were to pick a social networking platform to find a boyfriend on, IT’D BE THAT ONE.

    I actually made an appointment to meet my boyfriend…he was my academic advisor. Opening line: “Did all of my credits transfer over or what?!” He added me on Facebook, we bonded over heated competitions of Words With Friends, and the rest is history.

  19. Matt

    Wait..am I the only one who thinks this story is dodgy? He remembered you, your name, but not how you actually knew each other? And that whole story at the end seems a bit of a guess? What the fuck? Call me Captain Scepticism but that don’t sound right!

    Oh well..you seem happy and obviously haven’t been killed by a stalker so here’s hoping all’s well! lol.

  20. Barbara

    If it weren’t for Myspace, I would not have met my boyfriend. I won’t get rid of my profile, even though I haven’t logged into it in years.

  21. Sparrow Hall

    Spoiler alert: It’s basically a movie about Matt Damon trying to be with Emily Blunt while the agents of fate try to keep them apart. Which would never work, because Matt Damon is wicked smart.

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