On TV there’s always a group of friends who spontaneously meet up, or someone will call Tyler, and they’ll say, “Tyler, meet me at [whatever bar or coffee shop here]” and they hang up and don’t even give a time, and Tyler always shows up. And let’s not forget the ole drop-by. This happens a lot on “Beverly Hills, 90210” (the original). EVERYONE drops by Dylan’s house. I understand why TV writers do this. To show characters calling each other, or texting each other, is a lot less interesting than having them speak in person. But this trope gave me false hopes about what being an “adult” would be like. And by “adult,” I mean any cool, awesome chick from 18 – 30. From Clarissa Darling to Carrie Bradshaw. I thought that once I turned that magical adult age, I would have a close group of friends who would always be available to meet at “our” place or drop by unexpectedly.
I don’t think this is a real thing.
If you and people you know live in NYC (like the village or somewhere stupid in Brooklyn) or Los Angeles (in somewhere like Silverlake or Los Feliz or maybe even Venice) you can experience the magic TV moments of running into your friends at a nearby restaurant or other local joint. That’s why I like where I live now, even though I use to ruthlessly make fun of it all the time. I like being able to walk everywhere. I used to live in Manhattan and that was one of my favorite things, ever. To just get out of your studio apartment and walk. And see people. And things. And get hammered and take a taxi back or walk. Or if you’re really desperate, the subway. Yes, I can be quite an elitist jerk, don’t even bother pointing that out. I think that jeans and beer are for poor people. And if that shocks or upsets you, then I’m sorry. I’m like Patrick Bateman, but a woman, and with a lot less money and murders.
I think I have lots of friends. Maybe? It’s hard to tell. What’s a friend? Someone who goes to your bday party? Someone you don’t feel awkward having a one on one conversation with? Someone you know really well? I don’t really feel like I have a lot of close friends. But I have friends I can talk to. I wish I had a closely knit group, like the ones in “How I Met Your Mother” and “Friends.” But perhaps those don’t exist. At least not after college. But just once, I’d like to send out a mass text with, “MEET AT COOLBARWELIKEHERE at 9!” and everyone shows up, or at the very least, doesn’t ignore my text.
For more on friendship, read this old post: Friends.