Oh hay just posing at a fast food BBQ joint, no big deal. Instagram @apocalypstick
This going to sound like the musings of an incredibly stoned person, who is in bed eating Trader Joe’s snack mix while watching “Breaking Bad” but having to constantly rewind because they’re ironically too high to understand it, but I swear I am not stoned. Currently.
Life is so very weird. For example, I now both drink and enjoy iced coffee. You get what I’m saying? Big news. Life is weird, it’s like, one minute you’re the hottest bestest newest thing and the next minute you’re fat and bald and starring in a remake of The Taking of Pelham 1 2 3. You know? The weird thing about life is that things don’t seem to change day by day. You wake up and think, I have to do this same stuff again. But when you think really far back, there was a time when you weren’t doing that stuff. Somehow everything changed. And look at your friends, what are they up to? One minute they’re there, the next minute they’re gone, or sick, or incredibly famous. Usually all three, if you live in LA. Life is weird.
A lot has changed for me within the past year. A complete turn around. I even look different physically, in that I have never looked more like Mick Jagger in my life. And my stomach is constantly upset. I think it’s because beneath my skin is a fine layer of stress. Someone suggested I meditate. Sit in a chair and set a timer for 10 minutes and just sit there and breathe. I’m sorry, sir, but no. I can’t sit in a chair for 10 minutes and do nothing. I’ll just be thinking about the timer going off. I’ll start with one minute. Even that seems really hard. Heating up Hot Pockets in the microwaves seems to take hours.
I should eat less Hot Pockets.
I just want to know what’s going to happen. Where will I be next year? Actually, no, that’s too far ahead. Where will I be next month? Can someone spoiler alert my life? I don’t have time for this shit. I don’t want the journey, I want the destination. Fuck the journey, the journey sucks. No one on the Oregon Trail was like, “This is so awesome how we’re running out of food and dying of dysentery, it’s all gonna go downhill once we get there.”
Kids, help.
Ha ha so… I LOVED this post. I am way to damn high strung to SIT BACK and “let things unfold”. No. I HAVE to know what comes next. It’s like… ADHD for life-matters. Anyway- this post reminded me of a shirt I just ordered… You may want to order one too. I think it’s funny 😀
http://www.bustedtees.com/dysentery
Truly-
Spazztik
I need to get a tuxedo to match that tee. It’s the only way to do it justice.
I know exactly what you mean about hating not knowing what is going to happen. I just moved somewhere new to make a life for myself and it sucks right now, I’m like, can’t I just fast forward to the bit where I’m really successful and have made a ton of new friends?
But if I link this to your previous post, the advice I keep telling myself right is, ‘Chill out – the beginning is always the hardest part.’
By the way I pretty much stalk your blog these days, keep it up.
Corinne x
In college my friend teased me for weeks for saying, “I just want to skip the orientation crap and go right to having friends.”
Thank you, stalk away!!
that is exactly what i kept thinking during orientation week at college. the ice breaker games made me break out into hot sweats from having so much anxiety about making friends. HALP.
Yes, but would anyone play the “What happened after they finished the Oregon Trail and started their real lives” game? I think not.
Mick Jagger or not, you look amazing in that pic.
@Diary of Why
Forgive me for being a “nerd” but… It’s called Oregon Trail: American Settlers. And I was an addict. AM. I AM an addict.
I did not know that is the actual title. How could I not have known? What’s going on?
I would play that game but I also liked American Girl Dolls.
Thank you!
Sorry dude. The only spoiler alert is that eventually we all die, and basically any day we’re alive is a better day than a day we’re gone. So if the day sucks, its better than the alternative. Then again, I don’t live in LA.
You’re fabulous, so that’s something, right?
Do try meditation. It’s not about straining to think of nothing…to have a completely quiet and still mind can take years and years of practice and comes naturally. Meditation has really helped me a lot, though it’s taken a lot of persistence! Read Charlotte Joko Beck ‘Everyday Zen’ and Thich Nhat Hanh ‘The Heart of the Buddha’s Teaching’. They’re wonderful teachers about life, even if you are not interested in Buddhism. – not sure how flippant you were being with your comments on meditation, but just thought I would write this anyway just in case…
Hi,
I’m new in this line of blog and what can i say when i read ur post… remains the world in our hand – not in our heart.
GENIAL !!!
that is a really good picture! your hot
its mostly the pants with your slender blackness
YES. The journey sucks. But then old people are all like ‘being old sucks, the journey here was so much better’ which can only lead to one conclusion: the destination is WORSE than the journey. Just shoot me now.
“Can someone spoiler alert my life?” = best effing thing I’ve read all week. So that’s something. When the journey sucks or is taking too long, I cope by upping my drinking, dancing, and crap eating. Give it a try!
You do look like Mick Jagger. That’s a compliment.
AWESOME. Thank you!!
Can I just tell you for the millionth time how much I love you? Because I do.
OMG I love this. Exactly “fuck the journey”. (That was gramatically incorrect of me, the period should’ve come before the quotation mark) Anywho… Jeez… I cannot even begin to explain the extent to which I agree with you on this and how I am exactly the same way. I cannot see where I will be in two months to a year. I want it all RIGHT NOW. I have people all around telling me “oh wait a year for that it will come soon enough.” GOD NO IT WON’T. I have been in college for 6 years and I’ll still be doing time for about two more years… why? Because I can’t see past one year I can’t see far enough in the future to know exactly what I want to do already so I keep changing my mind and changing majors.
Thank you for giving me some validation that I am not the only person in the world wanting to rush everything!!!
P.S. Do you still live with your mom? I read something previously that indicated you kind of maybe might or perhaps you spend a lot of time with her? I still live with my mom and I’m in my mid twenties! Pathetic? God I hope not.