HOW TO NOT FEEL LIKE A TOTAL FAILURE

Feb

2014

Uncommon Goods

I don’t doubt for a second that women are harder on ourselves than men. We’ll stare at our thighs and let out a stream of curse words that would make Joe Pesci say, “Whoa, chill out.” We’d stay stuff to ourselves guys would never even dream of saying to us. When men fail, they tend not to take it as personally as we do.

Let’s change that.

As someone going through what we call a “transitional period” (read: “I feel like a total fuck-up” period), I have some tips how how to not feel like a total failure, even though you may really, really want to.

So, you gained some weight.

This one sucks because no one can tell you “oh it’s all on your head” if the dress that fit you 2 years ago now seems like it was made for a doll. “WHO IS PUTTING DOLL CLOTHES IN MY CLOSET?” you want to scream. If it doesn’t zip, it doesn’t fit, and that’s just how it is. Firstly, as with all “failures” don’t feel bad about feeling bad — you’re allowed to take a moment to wallow even if it’s over not being able to fit into a skirt that’s honestly kind of ugly to begin with. So take your moment to feel bad.

NOW you have to change your current thoughts, feelings, and behaviors so that you set yourself up for a better future. That goes with any “failure.” You wallow, then you pull yourself together. Make a plan to exercise every day or every other day — or just start with once a week. Just plan it. Then do it. Then for every day you work out, put a sticker in your planner or write a big fat X. Then watch your progress grow into a sea of stickers or X’s. Go out and buy healthy foods. Start cooking for yourself at least once a week. Just start.

Sometimes, even if our clothes don’t fit, the weight gain is only visible to us. No one else can tell. We are really our own harshest critics and only we know how our clothes really fit. They might feel tighter but people don’t have X-Ray vision — they can’t tell the way you can.

And maybe it’s enough for people to notice. Okay, so what? It’s not like you drowned a bag of kittens. You decided to eat indulgently and not work out. That’s actually not a crime. That’s actually totally okay. But if you’re unhappy with it, change it. Don’t whine about it and then not change it. That’s the worst.

So, you lost your job.

This one sucks because losing your job can mean huge life changes, like having to move. Some of us are okay with big changes. Some of us resist it and hate it with everything we’ve got, like a cat in a costume.

In most cases, your job loss was not personal. It’s not like you were let go because no one liked you. And let’s say you got fired because in fact, it waspersonal. Guess what? That was a terrible work environment and you’re going to be a better person for not being there. The only way to handle a job loss is to spin it until you find the bright side. For example, now you can focus on what you really want to do. Maybe it’s time to make big career changes. Maybe now you can follow your dream. But really, do more than follow it — hunt that motherfucker down. Turn this loss into a gain.

And maybe you’re going to have to make sacrifices, like selling a major item, moving, or taking on a crappy part-time job until you find something. And it’s okay to be upset by that. But you can’t be upset about it every day for the rest of your life. You just can’t. You can, but you’ll have no friends left and you’ll be completely miserable. Is that something you actively want to choose?

You’re not a failure because you lost your job. Lots of people lose jobs. You’re only a failure if you let it define you as a person. You are not your job.

So, you got dumped.

This one sucks because it is personal. It’s the most personal thing in the world. Even if someone says, “It’s not you, it’s me” they’re still talking about you. How can you not feel hurt?

Once again, take time to mourn the loss of the relationship. Cry, shout, do what you have to do to keep yourself from holding onto any anger or sadness inside. Don’t keep it all inside. It will explode later at the company picnic when Deborah takes the last corn on the cob. That bitch. Let it out now.

Then start to heal. Think about what you learned from the relationship. We always learn something. Maybe it’s as simple as, “I’ll never date guys under 24 again.” Fine. Go with that. Just take something, anything and learn from it. Grow from it. Don’t let it make you bitter. If you let it make you bitter, you’re turning your future self into an asshole. No one likes the asshole who is caustic about relationships and uses every opportunity to bash their ex. Write about it. Make funny videos. Turn it into something positive. Even if it’s just a funny tweet. That one tweet is something good and positive, and that’s exactly what you need.

You’re only a total failure if you allow yourself to stop growing. And how do you grow? By learning from mistakes, facing change, and doing things that scare you. (At least, those are some ways.) Accept your loss, mourn it, then move on. Because you owe it to your future self. You owe your future self success, even if present self feels nothing but failure. Ignore present self. Think about future self. What do you want to do for her?

Photo credit: Uncommon Goods. Originally posted on The Gaggle, by me.

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The Inconvenient Truth About Woody Allen

Feb

2014

Indeed. Photo by me.

Dylan Farrow, Woody Allen’s adopted — I hate to even make the distinction, but I know if I don’t include the word “adopted” people will jump on me, as if the word “adopted” makes everything better — daughter, recently came out with an open letter detailing the sexual abuse she suffered under Woody Allen when she was 7 years old. Before I get to that, I think it’s important to provide some historical context. Though Woody Allen was accused of molesting his daughter, Dylan, in 1992, it went largely ignored compared to say, Roman Polanski’s crime — people heard about it, and knew about it, but didn’t really react like they did with Polanski. At the time it happened, Vanity Fair did a long story, detailing accounts by Maureen O’Sullivan, Mia Farrow’s mother, who says she saw inappropriate activity like Allen rubbing sunscreen where he shouldn’t:

One summer day in Connecticut, when Dylan was four and Woody was applying suntan lotion to her nude body, he alarmed Mia’s mother, actress Maureen O’Sullivan, and sister Tisa Farrow when he began rubbing his finger in the crack between her buttocks. Mia grabbed the lotion out of his hand, and O’Sullivan asked, “How do you want to be remembered by your children?” “As a good father,” Woody answered. “Well, that’s interesting,” O’Sullivan replied. “It only lasted a few seconds, but it was definitely weird,” says Tisa Farrow.

A baby-sitter also had her own strange account:

Dylan was on the sofa, wearing a dress, and Woody was kneeling on the floor holding her, with his face in her lap. The baby-sitter did not consider it “a fatherly pose,” but more like something you’d say “Oops, excuse me” to if both had been adults. She told police later that she was shocked. “It just seemed very intimate. He seemed very comfortable.”

Dylan told her mother that her (adopted) father, Woody Allen, had sexually abused her. Although the whole thing turned into a horrific media circus, it would have been so much worse had the internet exploded around that time. What most people remember about Woody Allen from the 1990’s is that he had an affair with, and went on to marry, girlfriend Mia Farrow’s (adopted) teenage daughter Soon-Yi. He seemed completely bewildered that people were so upset about his actions. Here are some excerpts from an interview with Time magazine, in which he famously said, “The heart wants what it wants”,

Q. Your movies always explore these types of emotions and motives. You must have sat up one night and thought about the problems you might cause dating the daughter of a previous lover, a mother she doesn’t like?

A. I didn’t think about her not liking Mia. I did think that, well, she is the adoptive daughter of my previous girlfriend, but that didn’t mean anything to me. It didn’t manifest itself in any significant way. She was a grown, sophisticated person. She was raised in New York.

Q. You’re a guy who can find moral dilemmas in a broken DON’T WALK sign. Didn’t you see some here?

A. I didn’t find any moral dilemmas whatsoever. I didn’t feel that just because she was Mia’s daughter, there was any great moral dilemma. It was a fact, but not one with any great import. It wasn’t like she was my daughter.

Q. Did you ever discuss with her, “What is Mom going to think of this?”

A. Mom would have thought more or less the same thing if it had been my secretary or an actress.

Q. Come on!

A. There is a different psychodynamic here, without any question, but the difference is one of small degree. If I had said to “Mom” — it was actually “Mia” that she called her — I’m in love with my secretary, there would have been some version of the same thing.

(“Come on!” indeed.) On Saturday, February 1st, Dylan Farrow posted an open letter to The New York Times, asking the reader,

What’s your favorite Woody Allen movie? Before you answer, you should know: when I was seven years old, Woody Allen took me by the hand and led me into a dim, closet-like attic on the second floor of our house. He told me to lay on my stomach and play with my brother’s electric train set. Then he sexually assaulted me. He talked to me while he did it, whispering that I was a good girl, that this was our secret, promising that we’d go to Paris and I’d be a star in his movies. I remember staring at that toy train, focusing on it as it traveled in its circle around the attic. To this day, I find it difficult to look at toy trains.

[…] What if it had been your child, Cate Blanchett? Louis CK? Alec Baldwin? What if it had been you, Emma Stone? Or you, Scarlett Johansson? You knew me when I was a little girl, Diane Keaton. Have you forgotten me? Woody Allen is a living testament to the way our society fails the survivors of sexual assault and abuse.

Everyone caught up? Now, to get to my point. I am, or rather, was, an enormous Woody Allen fan. I found relief and solace in someone who was so talented and so much more neurotic than I am. That poster I posted at the top has been with me through 3 different houses and apartments. I have a vintage Annie Hall poster that I’ve had since I was a teenager. I loved Woody Allen. I loved his films, his writing, his whole persona. I heard about the abuse claims, but I thought they were just that — claims, made even more exaggerated by media hype and a resentful ex.

After reading Dylan’s letter, I can’t even look at his face. I understand how some people could. Some people can separate the artist from their work. I thought I could, but I’m starting to think that is impossible. The same person who came up with the witty dialogue in Annie Hall is the same person who molested a 7-year-old girl. He is the same person who still makes her feel like that scared little girl in an attic, unable to even glance at a toy train without feeling horror.

Let’s be honest here: this is a very inconvenient truth about Woody Allen for Woody Allen fans. It’s like when he first preyed on Soon-Yi; It was easy for me to reason, “Well, he didn’t actually adopt Soon-Yi and she wasn’t technically his stepdaughter either; he didn’t even live with Mia and it wasn’t illegal.” That was a very easy thing to do, and I did it. I didn’t even bother to read up on the story. I didn’t even know he took nude photos of a teenage Soon-Yi and hid them in his room. Being ignorant is easy.

It would be far easier to ignore Dylan’s letter, or to believe the piece written by a Daily Beast editor who supports Allen and claims he is not biased, despite the fact that he directed Woody Allen’s documentary and makes every appearance of being in his inner circle. It would be easier, though far more awful, to blame the victim or not believe her, though she has absolutely nothing to gain by showing her face and telling her story. It would be easier for Woody Allen fans to click the little “x” on Dylan Farrow’s piece and click the play button on a DVD player and enjoy their hundredth viewing of Manhattan (a film in which Allen’s character has a relationship with a teenage girl).

It’s easy to say, “it’s unfair of her to call out other actors, they had nothing to do with this.” It’s easy because we view actors as people who are above us. Who have rules that do not apply to them. Because, were Woody Allen the boss of a shoe store in a mall, everyone would be horrified and would congratulate Dylan Farrow for coming forward. If Cate Blanchett was someone who sold shoes in his store, we would say, “Come on now, you don’t need a job that badly. Shame on you.” But we don’t, because Cate Blanchett is a famous actress, and Woody Allen is a famous director.

So while it’s far easier to ignore what Allen has done, I cannot. I believe Dylan Farrow. I believe that taking nude photos of his girlfriend’s daughter and then seducing her was wrong. I believe in the judge’s decision to take custody of Dylan away from Woody Allen and to deny him any sort of contact. I believe that something truly awful happened, and I believe that it is easier for Hollywood to celebrate Woody Allen and put Diane Keaton on a stage to accept an award on his behalf.

By ignoring this, we are turning our backs on that 7-year-old. We are telling her that we prefer her abuser’s entertainment for our enjoyment over her inconvenient truth. Is that really something we want to do?

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How To Pack

Jan

2014

I was supposed to be packing, but instead I made a video on how to pack. Hint: prioritize your spices.

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Interview With Hey Arnold’s Craig Bartlett

Jan

2014

Craig Bartlett

My inner child was freaking the eff out when I met Craig Bartlett at the Jim Henson lot. Craig Bartlett is responsible for one of the best Nickelodeon shows of all time, Hey Arnold!. Later, I asked him some questions about Paul McCartney, Hey Arnold!, and the golden age of Nickelodeon.

Craig, thank you for joining me on my weird corner of the internet. Can you please tell my readers your Paul McCartney story?

A lot of old rockers still record at Henson studios because this used to be A&M records, after it was Charlie Chaplin’s movie studio. They think this place has great mojo, and they’re right. Fantastic, classic records were recorded here. Last spring when we were writing on Dinosaur Train, Joe Purdy said “Guess who’s on the lot today? Paul McCartney.”

I thought I’d never actually see him – they’d whisk him from his car to the studio, so I kind of forgot about it (as much as one can forget that a Beatle is within 100 yards). I worked till about 7:30, and it was dusk when I walked out. I was heading to the Kermit bathroom outside the recording studio and I noticed a blue Stingray convertible parked in the middle of the courtyard. I thought, “That’s got to be for Paul.” So I peed as fast as I could (yes, I washed my hands) and went back to sit at the bench right in front of the Stingray.

I assume this is how Craig looked while waiting for Sir Paul McCartney.

Continue reading →

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Open Letter To Myself

Jan

2014

Almie Rose

Dear Almie,

GET IT TOGETHER. This is the second day in a row you’ve worn sweatpants and I’m guessing tomorrow will be the third. Okay, so you gained some weight, and sweat pants are maybe the only thing that fit you comfortably right now. But you can’t keep doing this. It’s unseemly. You’re not a college student. You can’t roll out of bed in sweatpants and then wear the sweatpants with a hoodie up top. You just CAN’T.

And STOP DRINKING WINE AT 3-4 IN THE AFTERNOON. Yeah, you’re a freelance writer, you can do it, but can doesn’t mean should. And yeah, maybe it makes you a better writer, because you feel freer. And yeah, maybe it’s cheaper than going out. And yeah, okay, you know what, go ahead and keep drinking.

Look, it’s okay that you hate pants. We all hate pants. It’s okay. Pants are the enemy. If they don’t have an elastic waistband, they’re not worth wearing. But don’t use that as an excuse to wear sweatpants every day. You gained the weight, you can take it off. You’re being lazy.

AND YOU HATE LAZINESS. “Don’t be afraid to try again. Everyone goes south, every now and then.” Who said that, Almie? Who said that? That’s right, Billy Fucking Joel said that. What does that have to do with anything? Well, it’s playing right now. So…so there’s that. What was the point? Oh yeah, laziness. DON’T BE THAT WAY. Laziness is an abhorrent trait. You work really hard but you relax just as hard. I know that at the end of the day, the last thing you feel like doing is the dishes, but who’s going to them if you don’t? Yeah you could wait around for your boyfriend to do them for you, but do you really want to do that? I mean, yeah you kind of do. BUT DON’T DO THAT. HE AIN’T YO MAID, GIRL. Is he Robin Williams in a wig? No? Then are we to understand he’s not Mrs. Doubtfire? Correct. He is NOT Mrs. Doubtfire. You’ve been over this theory and it’s been debunked, as he looks NOTHING LIKE Mrs. Doubtfire.

Almie, WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT.

Okay, let’s just sum this up: get it together, lose weight, wear less sweatpants, do the dishes.

Good talk.

Love,

Almie

If you could write an open letter to yourself, what would it say? Write your own in the comments.

Photo credit: Patrick Gookin.

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What Men Really Think About Makeup

Dec

2013

nina-leen-makeup

Makeup and the women who use it have had a long history of love and hate. Some women love experimenting with makeup and won’t leave the house without it; others hate it and would rather go barefaced as the day they were born. But what do men think about makeup, really? Do they like when we wear it? How much is too much? What do they think “natural makeup” is? I asked some men of varying ages to try to get some answers. Of course, every man is different. But if you’re curious about what men really think about makeup, this is for you.

Men in their 20’s.

“Do I like when women wear makeup? My gut response is no. I always tell my girlfriend she doesn’t need it and looks beautiful without it, which I really mean. That being said I did see the Mila Kunis picture without her wearing makeup and was blown away by how different she looked. I guess I’ve always underestimated the transformative powers of makeup.” — Nick, 26.

“Sure [I like when women wear makeup]. I’m a little old-fashioned. But that’s like asking, ‘Do you like it when women wear clothes?’ It’s all a question of what, and how much. It’s good when there’s a clear difference between everyday makeup and special occasion makeup. It’s a nice gesture to have a girl make for you, albeit not a hugely important one. That said, some girls can totally rock huge eyelashes and eyeshadow 24/7. I’d just avoid a full Dee Snider whenever possible. I feel like I’m failing a critical gender theory class just be answering these questions.” — Jesse, 29.

“I’m not a big fan of makeup. I think it takes away from a person’s natural beauty. I understand it’s practical at times, but I prefer the less-is-more approach. Caked-on foundation, no thank you. ‘Natural makeup’ would probably be things like lipstick and eyeliner. They accentuate features, but don’t necessarily cover up blemishes and what not. Blemishes are what make people attractive, at least in my opinion.” — Matt, 27.

“Certain girls look good with makeup, and some look good ‘natural’. Though I’m not too disappointed in a well done smokey eye. Now, ‘too much makeup’ is something that really depends on the occasion. Obviously costume parties and the like have to be excluded from this. Day-to-day, ‘too much’ makeup is hard to define, as it’s really about what’s comfortable for the person wearing it, and however they feel they look best. I suppose I would define ‘natural makeup’ as light, merely highlighting facial features as opposed to drawing attention to them particularly.” — Shaun, 23.

“I like when make up goes unnoticed. I dislike when it becomes the main character of the face. It gives me the creeps seeing baroque art imitation on girls faces. I think less is more with this kind of stuff.” — Ivan, 28.

“I really like the way a bit of eyeliner and mascara can accentuate a whole look. It serves as a spotlight on her beauty rather than a concealer of her ‘flaws’. I had a girlfriend that I knew for quite a while before I ever saw her completely devoid of any foundation or concealer. When I did finally see her face untouched by makeup, adorable freckles were revealed on the tops of her cheeks. She never looked more beautiful to me.” — James, 29.

“I don’t mind a little makeup if we’re going out, but if we’re just hanging in I don’t think any is necessary. You’re wearing too much makeup if I can’t kiss you or touch your face because it’ll smear. [I have] no clue what ‘natural makeup’ is. Ummmm, chapstick and moisturizing lotion?” — Cliff, 27.

Men in their 30’s.

“[Makeup] can certainly look nice, but it is not appealing in and of itself. Wearing makeup badly, meaning ‘too much’, is far worse than wearing none at all. Anything more than the faintest highlight can be too much. I’m not sure [what ‘natural makeup’ is]. I guess if makeup smooths over blemishes but isn’t recognizable as makeup, then it’s ‘natural’. That seems fine by me.” — “Nick”, 38.

“I’m not into the drag queen layers some girls wear. If you look like Mimi from the Drew Carey show, you’re doing it wrong. Makeup should enhance your good features, not create them.” — Doug, 31.

“[‘Too much’ makeup] is pretty much subjective. However, if a woman’s wearing so much foundation and concealer that I can’t see the texture of her skin, I’m left wondering what the hell she’s covering up. Frankly, there’s no such thing [as ‘natural makeup’].” — Allen, 36.

“I guess ‘too much’ makeup is when a woman literally is covered in a mask of makeup. Basically, I would like her to look essentially the same whether we’re at the gym or at a cocktail party. Some makeup is fine, but I’m partial to the ‘natural look’ of rouge and maybe mascara and eyeliner.” — Keith, 38.

Men in their 40’s.

“A little [makeup] is alright. A little blush, a little eyeshadow. Enhancement of your natural color, not something that will look like a watercolor painting in a rainstorm if you sweat or cry a little. If you look like Tammy Faye Bakker doing her impression of the Joker you’ve gone too far.” — Joe, 42.

“Although a natural look is great, makeup that accentuates a woman’s finer points can be very appealing and even seductive. That’s not to say it’s necessary, just a nice accompaniment. The ’70s disco scene or ’80s hair band or Boy George looks were examples of too much makeup. While red lipstick and nails can be very attractive and sexy some of the time, and other colorful applications can be terrific once in awhile as accents, painting oneself like a clown has never appealed to me. I’d rather see the real person than the mask. Sheryl Crow comes to mind as someone who, even when wearing a lot of makeup, usually appears relatively natural because of the makeup styles and colors that blend in with her look and accentuate her natural features rather than hiding them.” — Paul, 46.

“I like when women wear makeup for an occasion — like going out to dinner — when they dress up, so it’s part of the ensemble. Glamorous times! For just hanging out or whatever, I’m always baffled that women feel the need to put on makeup. If you have to ask ‘Is this too much makeup?’, the answer is yes. ‘Natural makeup’ to me is when it’s very similar to the woman’s real face — skin tone, eyelash and eyebrow color. It’s using makeup to just take care of a few imperfections and make things a little more even. If you do it right, most people won’t even be sure you have makeup on.” — “Scott”, 42

So what have we learned?

There’s been a lot of talk of covering “blemishes.” What do men consider “blemishes”? Some consider them “zits” while others think blemishes are exclusively something like “sun damage”. It seems the majority of men do not know what ‘natural makeup’ is. Nick, 26, asked if it was “subtle make up that is barely visible or is it makeup made from natural products?” Some men thought it meant no makeup at all while others thought it meant just chapstick and maybe some mascara. Basically, they all agreed that if your face is a different color from your neck, that’s not good, and if they can see foundation (“caked-on” was used a lot), that’s also not good.

Photo: Nina Leen via LIFE photo archives for Google. Originally posted from The Gaggle.

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The Mad Men Interviews: Elisha Yaffe

Dec

2013

Welcome to the final installment of The Mad Men Interviews, in which I interview friends who appeared on my favorite show, Mad Men. Part one was an interview with Molly Hawkey, who played a scientist who told Don Draper, “You can’t smoke in here.” Part two was with Eric Scott Cooper, who played a TV commercial director in the first episode to introduce the Jimmy Barrett storyline. Now I’m speaking with Elisha Yaffe, who guested on one of Mad Men‘s hippiest episode ever (“Christmas Waltz”, season 5, episode 9).

Rich Sommer (Harry), looking at Elisha Yaffe in total disbelief.

For those who don’t know how the biz works, can you tell us how you wound up being on Mad Men?
I auditioned. Which really means driving for about 45 minutes in traffic, worrying how I’m going to fuck the lines I’ve memorized, calming myself down by saying, “Hey, it’s just a first audition and not a callback. So just go in there and have fun” and then being shocked to see [showrunner/executive producer/writer] Matthew Weiner in the room for my first read.

Were you a fan of the show before you were on it? How about after?
Yes. After? No. I couldn’t respect a show that would decide to cast me.

Classic Groucho Marx. How many times did you have to audition?
Once. I auditioned for a few different parts. Read through each a few times. Matthew gave me a few notes. Very helpful, direct, supportive notes. Mostly pointing out what he liked about what I was doing, which immediately gave me confidence and helped me relax.

Who was your scene with?
Michael Gladis (Paul Kinsey) and Rich Sommer (Harry Crane).

Anything memorable happen you can share?
It was Paul Kinsey’s (Michael Gladis) return after being away for a bit. His character was revealed to have become a Hare Krishna in the episode and the producers really didn’t want anyone to find out. So we all had to hide under parkas and umbrellas when being transported to set. Which made sense for Michael but honestly, I’m pretty sure if I walked down the street undisguised no one would have minded.

Paul Kinsey’s new look.

You were in one of Mad Men‘s first “hippie scenes.” Did you realize you were in an episode of the show that was changing the tone for the rest of the series?
No, though that was cool after the fact. The only thing I was aware of on set, is that the role I was playing essentially could’ve been based on my real-life hippie father. After the fact, it felt like a dream I would’ve had after talking to my dad about his love for the Grateful Dead and then falling asleep to an episode of Mad Men. If a younger version of my dad had been transported into the Mad Men universe, he would have been my character. So that was quite surreal.

(You can first see Elisha at 26 seconds in, giving a “Hare Krishna” to Michael Gladis’s character, Paul. Note: I didn’t record this video.)

What was the reaction from family and friends when you told them you were going to be on the show?
I wasn’t allowed to tell them until it was about to air. After it did, my dad only had a few notes. His main one was that he felt they should have made a joke about how the hippies mostly came to see Indian gurus not to find their inner self, but for the free indian food that would always be readily available post-meditation session.

Do you have a favorite “Mad Men” character and/or episode?
Yes. Pete. He’s such a twerp. I love-hate him.

Why do you act professionally? Do you ever see yourself stopping?
Ha. I ask myself that every day. I think the same part of me that doubts myself and questions almost every nuance of life at all hours of day is the same part of me that can center itself through the exercise of acting. When I get to take on a character, I’m allowed to put myself in another person’s shoes and satisfy my true hippie nature that somehow thinks I have a chance in hell of understanding every single human being in this universe. In short, in my best stoner voice, [does best stoner voice] “We’re all just people, man”.

Could I ever see myself stopping as an actor? Yes. But only if people asked me politely.

What are you working on now? Where can we see you next?
Right now, I have a short film called TIME TRAVEL LOVER I acted and wrote in. Directed by the incredible music video director Bo Mirosseni, Partizan Films graciously financed and produced it. They were fantastic and supportive throughout the entire process. It was the first indie thing I had financed. We just started submitting it to festivals. Another short I acted in and helped produce called DALAI LAMA, is also waiting to hear back from a couple of festivals. Some TV and film parts coming up too. I do stand up sometimes. But I like the stuff I make with my friends best. Did I mention I was a hippie in real life? 10 times already? Come on, you have to be exaggerating. And even if you are, I’m not judging. Peace and love.

In all seriousness, I’m pretty sure Mr. Weiner assumed I was a non-actor who wandered into the room stoned.

Oh, I’m sure, too. Thanks, Elisha!