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What do you do when your ex leaves you for his A-list actress ex girlfriend?
How do you land a musician boyfriend?
What's it like to make a total jackass of yourself when you meet that actor you've had a crush on for years?
What would When Harry Met Sally...
look like in 2013?
Am I hungry?
These questions and more are answered and explored by Almie Rose in "I Forgot To Be Famous";
essays and how-to's about dating, relationships, living in Los Angeles, and how they all crash into each other, like the car chase scene in the mall in the Blues Brothers movie...which she hasn't seen, but is not at all opposed to.
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I’d watch that. Regularly. And then Tweet about it on the Twitter that I don’t actually have.
THIS IS GREAT.
Only Marge has to be played by the sister from “The Trotsky” with the slightly awkward bangs.
But maybe not.
Thank you Kate. I was worried no one would “get it.” But if one person gets it, that’s enough. I will film this in my backyard and send you a DVD with commentary.
I am definitely using “Which do you prefer, Home Alone, or Home Alone 2: Lost In New York?” as a first date question from now on. Now I just need to figure out what your answer says about you!
I use it regularly. However what my friend and I realized is that we are the only ones who prefer H2:LiNY. Is it us? Or is it them?
No, that’s totally my answer too! I think that we are obviously a superior breed of people.
Couple weeks late on this but NOPE IT’S DEFINITELY THEM.
Home Alone 2 Supremacy.
Bahahahahahahaha!!! Holy shit. That was funny.
I relate to it a lot.
Thanks! Glad you like.
This is my favorite post ever, on so many levels.
So many levels.
Oh I know.
GET OUT OF MY HEAD
I feel like I’ve had this dream. Is that weird?
No, I could totally see you having this dream.
This is the best thing ever. I was doing some serious out loud laughing!
Yay!! Thank you!
Boy, I’ve really learned a lot today. For instance: Boobs have the power to change a person’s location within space and time. (One can only assume that this was caused by the boobs.) Also, if you are a bad date and completely ignore a girl’s very important question about the Kevin McAllister Saga (a.k.a. Home Alone 1&2), you WILL be killed by lions.
And finally, chicks named Marge are in charge and are women.
I would fund the hell out of this project.
You totally get it.
Duh. We’re like totes movie soulmates and such. By the way, I have ALWAYS preferred Home Alone 2: Lost In New York. Sticky Bandits > Wet Bandits. FACT.
LOL THAT LAST LINE IS SO TWEETABLE
Awwwww. You think I’m Tweetable! You’re thin. 🙂
This is something I would be proud to have written, particularly the last page and a half. I would strongly urge you to raise $5,000 and turn this into a short film. I’m not sure what to do about the NY scenes, but this needs to be seen. By lots of people.
Maybe you can do two sequels, one with tigers, one with bears.
Thank you!
For the NY scenes I’ll take the tram tour at Universal Studios, hop off, get to the NYC/big city set and film it guerrilla style.
“i’m wearing a hat.”
“no, you’re not.”
“i like a smart woman!”
comedic gold!
That seems to be the favorite line. Thank you!!
The fact that “crowbars up” has not become a staple in American culture and something stupid like cats that can’t spell has is the whole reason we’re bombing stuff in Libya.
It’s science really.
Also, I would like to buy your screenplay. I already have a director. McG.
Awesome, but I was thinking Jon Waters. Is there a combination of the two, or is that just Tarantino? In which case, ew no thanks.
this was already amazing and then your date arrived WITH THAT NAME and I had to twitch all over laughing while pretending to sneeze or something really awkward during this Very Serious meeting about our domestic violence program.
…i went to your high school.
bravo.
YES. YES! YES. AWESOME. HAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAA
You should add me on Facebook.
“Fucking lions, man”. Who knew they could overcome the lack of opposable thumbs to shoot you in the chest? I give it five stars.
That’s the twist ending! Well it’s the twist ending of the twist ending! FUCK NOW I GAVE AWAY BOTH TWIST ENDINGS.
Could. Not. Stop. Laughing. I love you.
Hugs and high fives! Thank you.
I feel it necessary to comment on the Bacon.
Bacon is awesome, so awesome that Lady Gaga had a purse made of it. And now it is in your masterpiece.
Thank you for featuring Bacon.
PS: you are cool and this is pure genius.
This actually happened to me at a bar in Cape Cod. They brought out cups of bacon instead of cups of nuts or pretzels. I HAVE A PHOTO TO PROVE IT.
Thank you!
Double take at the date’s name. “Waaaait….”
I am going to name all male characters in anything I write Brian Wogensen from now on. 1. It’s just an awesome name 2. The delight 3. He’s a great guy
THIS SUMMER, YOU’LL SAY WHOA. AS IN WOGENSEN. BRIAN WOGENSEN. JULY 2012. STARRING BRADLEY COOPER.
I think this is really funny. REEALLLY FUNNY. Esp bacon-onwards.
I FORGOT I WROTE THIS! How could I?? Thank you so much for you compliments!