I Talked To A Psychic Over The Phone And Treated It Like Therapy


I am very open to psychics, and astrology. Once, a woman stopped me on the street and hold me I HAD to call her for a reading, because there was something she just HAD to tell me. She gave me her card, and I was totally ready to call her until I realized that on the card, she had spelled the word “spiritual” incorrectly. (I believe she spelled it, “speritual.” That was it for me.)

So when I got an email asking if I was interested in a free “love reading,” I said yes, but asked instead if it could be a career reading, because for once, I am very satisfied with my love life and have no questions. They said absolutely, and arranged for me to do the reading over the phone.

I’ve done phone readings before, and to be honest, I kind of treat them like therapy. Therapists and psychics really do have a lot in common. They both listen to you, remind you of your finest qualities, and offer some form of advice. A common misconception is that psychics tell you what will happen. Not really. A good psychic will never claim to know exactly what will happen to you and when. They merely open the door to possible futures, based on what they know about you, which shouldn’t be a lot. And if you’re just as open to them, you might get something out of it.

Here’s what went down: I got a call from a friendly voice who asked me for specific questions about my career. (It’s good to prepare a list of questions to ask beforehand). I asked those questions and she then asked me to say my name three times in a row. Okay. “Almie…Almie…Almie.” I sort of expected some sort of Beetlejuice thing to happen, but, alas.

Here’s what she said about me:

“[You’re] not looking directly at something, [you’re] looking away from something, instead of being focused forward.” 

“[You’re] a perfectionist who doesn’t like to make mistakes.”

She added, there’s “an area where [you’re] being mislead in some way.” That, “someone is being less than honest with me (in the business world).” She proceeded to compliment me, calling me “very witty” and said that I have a way of “helping others feel comfortable with themselves.

Here comes the future stuff: “I see you taking a big leap forward, more on your own, as you’re the one running the show. The path is very straightforward and direct. Less turmoil around you, almost less of the side jobs. [You’re like a] subway, and it’s going really fast.

This is the part where she told me that I was going to write “three things.” Tangible things. She says I “need” to write more, and as a result of writing these three things, I was going to be “very successful”, more than I ever expected. (Yes, I did tell her I was a writer, but that was it.) She said by October, one of the things I was writing would be completed, and that I shouldn’t delay. “Don’t delay, you live in LA” — this was a phrase that was stuck in her mind.

She totally called out that I feel stuck a lot, and that when this happens, I need to “take a break” and “go to the beach” or “sit by the water.” She added, “I see you on a small stage with a mic and you’re holding one of your books and talking about it and people love it.

Okay, sweet. Then she said this:

There’s a man out there who is saying unkind things about [you], criticized [you]. This is an odd person.” I didn’t know who she was referring to, other than, you know, the entire Internet.

Overall, she was complimentary and oddly motivating. And when I asked her about a specific job interview coming up, she got specific too, saying I was, “one of the most qualified people. They’re showing [your] foot in the door, it’s a 3 step process. I’m getting a big push from a spirit with this job interview, but you’re going to outgrow this job.” In the end, I wound up not taking the job (but it had nothing to do with what she told me, I promise.)

I hope my great job still lies in front of me. She said I should get used to being backstage; that I, “really have creative life and you’ve got the ticket. Just hold steady.” As for what’s getting in my way? She says it’s — get ready for this — myself. (Twist!). “Just get out of your own way.” She really nailed that part, and also the part where she told me, “you didn’t start too late, you’re exactly where you’re supposed to be…you did not miss any opportunities. you are right where you’re supposed to be.”

That warmed my heart.

So, we’ll see, Internet. We’ll see.


Do you believe in psychics? Ever had a reading? How did it go?


Photo by Nina Leen, via LIFE photo archives for Google.


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5 thoughts on “I Talked To A Psychic Over The Phone And Treated It Like Therapy

  1. Kelly L

    Okay, now I want to email that lady back and get MY reading. haha.

    Honestly, though… she sounds pretty spot on. I know they’re supposed to say things that can be interpreted by anyone to fit what they want it to fit, blah blah, but if you pretend a therapist said it instead of a psychic (and yes I can totally see how they’d be similar): it’s pretty solid.

    So, get out of your own way, ’cause I’m really intrigued by these three things you are going to write.

    1. Almie Rose Post author

      Haha, thanks love!

      I mean, OBVIOUSLY, I’m leaning towards a certain way, but I think you should definitely go for it! Treat it like therapy.


  2. Kendall

    I didn’t know people still fell for fortune teller scams. Thought even the most gullible woke up when the Psychic Network thing blew up. Wild that they can still get people to pay to hear general platitudes that anyone can relate too. Same with astrology. I don’t know anybody who makes life decisions because of the location of a star a billion miles away, but so be it. It’s all a sad way to cash in on people who have self-doubt.

    Time and energy might be better spend storing nuts for winter.

  3. Alissa

    Dude, love your blog! I forget how I stumbled upon it, but it’s awesome! Really fresh, unique, and versatile. No offense to fashion/fitness/food/lifestyle bloggers but those are so dime-a-dozen, I love that your blog has a new perspective to offer.

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