Singledom and the holidays.

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Full disclosure: this post is sponsored by AZO. Keep it real, ladies.

The holiday express is choo chooing down the track and you either have to hop on or jump in front of it. Hopefully, you jump on it. If you jumped in front of it, you can’t read this anymore. Because you’re dead. Because this is a very literal metaphor. So let’s get you on that train. Here’s the tricky part: are you traveling alone, or with a partner, on the holiday express?

The holidays have a way of making single people feel like they need to be part of a couple. Not even in a deep, serious way; sometimes in a more superficial way, because you need a really hot date to bring to that bangin’ New Year’s Eve party you’ve already decided to go to. I shall not be untruthful: I always want, need, and like to have a date on New Year’s Eve. I don’t know why this is. Maybe I feel like it’s the real people version of The Oscars. Everyone is all dressed up for a big evening ahead, and you know there’s going to be photos taken and making out to be had. Admittedly, I feel “cuffed” to this idea, of needing a date. And they’re emotional handcuffs that I’m putting on myself. They’re cute handcuffs though. The handcuffs are the guy, by the way. In case you didn’t figure that out. Just in case.

But please understand this: I’m not going to scour my Facebook friends list, cell phone contacts, or OKCupid for potential dates. I actually do have limits. If that’s something you do, that’s your thing, go do it. But I’m not at the level where I’m going to call some dude I had sex with once three years ago, breathless, saying, “HI WOULD YOU LIKE TO GO TO A NEW YEAR’S PARTY WITH ME, IT’S GOING TO BE FUN, I’M BREEZY!” And they’ll say, “Who is this?” And I’ll laugh nervously and say, “OH MY GOD, YOU GUYS, IT’S ALMIE!” And they’ll say, “Almie…it’s November 30th.” And I’ll say, “WELL YOU KNOW HOW QUICKLY SCHEDULES FILL UP AROUND THE HOLIDAYS.” And they’ll say, “Did you just pronounce it ‘shed-u-elles?’ And why are you shouting?” And I’ll say, “I have the wrong number, I was trying to reach Tyler.” And they’ll say, “This is Tyler.” And I’ll say, “Oh, I meant Ryan, bye.” (BTW, Tyler, this is in no way referring to you, I’m referring to The Tyler Technique. Even though, coincidentally, we did spend New Year’s together one year. And your name is Tyler. But it’s not you. Swear. I think you’re swell.)

As far as needing to have a date: it doesn’t matter. If you focus on the parts of the holidays that matter, like giving and love and gingerbread lattes or whatever, you’ll be just fine. I know this. We all know this. We just can’t forget it.

Does anyone else have these, “Oh no, it’s the holidays and I’m single” feelings? If you do, how do get over it?

Ladies, read the rest more info on AZO. Or guys too, whatever, it’s just not going to apply to you, and may cause confusion and fear.

 

A word from my responsible adult lady sponsor:

 

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This is a sponsored post written by me on behalf of AZO. The opinions and text are all mine.

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4 thoughts on “Singledom and the holidays.

  1. Kelly L

    I read a thing somewhere about having a “holiday girlfriend” (or boyfriend, I guess, but it was written by a dude who had chronic holiday girlfriends) where he found someone to date just during the holiday season and then they’d break up after. Or, maybe it was, like, a mutual decision to just date during the holidays with no further strings. I don’t even remember which makes this a horrible anecdote but there you have it.

  2. Melissa Marie

    I refuse to date during the holidays SPECIFICALLY because I so desperately don’t want to be alone during the holidays. (I should clarify that I won’t date NEW people… like actively seek new beaus or revisit old ones… if I’m already dating someone I don’t stop.) Any relationship that started between Thanksgiving and New Years would be based on that desperation (and not just mine, but likely also the dude’s) and would likely be very short-lived.

    My current “relationship” will likely barely survive the holiday so I’m kind of looking at it as being single already. Blarg. More egg nog, please?

  3. Rubi

    My birthday is at the beginning of the holiday season and I feel like such a loser when I’m single. No date for Thanksgiving or Birthday or Christmas or New Years or MLK day or Valentines. All other days are good, these days suck major donkey balls when you’re single. Especially when the whole point is so you wont feel loser-y, then when you ask out the hot guy in your class and he turns you down and its your birthday 2 days later.

    Sorry I have to stop writing my mom just put me on suicide watch.

  4. Matt

    I’m honestly stuck trying to wrap my head around the idea of want/needing a date – for any event. I’m single and have been for much of my time; yes I get lonely, but I never feel like I have to have a date to anywhere – I’ll rock up gladly solo and live it up! Besides, you could meet an awesome singleton just like yourself doing the same thang! I dunno, could be a cultural or gender thing. Insightful read as ever!

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