patrick bateman

Patrick Bateman of American Psycho is the ultimate workout champion. He prides himself on his physique. I get it, man. I am on a fitness kick and I am determined. The 30 Day Shred, a workout video by Jillian Michaels, is what I’ve been doing. It’s comprised of 3 levels; each level is for 10 days. Within those […]



Posted in: bret easton ellis, Health & Fitness, patrick bateman

Starbucks is full of minor annoyances that make my life really, really hard. It’s like, I have to return some videotapes and make my reservation at Dorsia and I don’t have time to deal with your fucking bullshit, Starbucks. There’s a Starbucks that knows me, and do you know what that feeling is like? It’s […]



Posted in: Minor annoyances, no i'm not drunk, patrick bateman

On TV there’s always a group of friends who spontaneously meet up, or someone will call Tyler, and they’ll say, “Tyler, meet me at [whatever bar or coffee shop here]” and they hang up and don’t even give a time, and Tyler always shows up. And let’s not forget the ole drop-by. This happens a lot […]



Posted in: friends, let's just talk from our hearts, patrick bateman

Here are some things I did and wrote about this week, in case you missed it. And in case you care. If you don’t, no worries, it’s a beautiful day in LA go outside! I list my top favorite bad songs of the ’90s on Hello Giggles. “Some say that Tom Green was before our […]



Posted in: mad men, patrick bateman, weekly wrap-up

By Cole Henley The British are better at so many things. Throwing weddings, speaking in cool voices, and above all, keeping calm. They are really good at not losing it. Examples: Mary Poppins, Dr. House, Will and Kate, Giles from Buffy, Helen Mirren, and Angela Lansbury’s greatest role ever as Mrs. Potts from Beauty and […]



Posted in: i guess this is advice, life lessons, patrick bateman

Rename all of the contacts in your phone with celebrity names. Then leave your phone lying out for someone to find. Chuckle when you say, “Kiki Dunst just loves texting.” Write inside jokes on your friends’ walls. It doesn’t matter if they’re actually in on the joke. I find Simpsons quotes work well. Just pick […]



Posted in: facebook, i guess this is advice, patrick bateman, Simpsons




Let It Die, Part Two.

I don’t know if it’s a girl thing or what but I’ve been noticing that a lot of my female friends have a hard time letting it go. They lament over their mistakes, their roads not taken, their misfortunes. CUT IT THE FUCK OUT. I know, this is far easier said than done. Yesterday I […]


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Posted in: music, patrick bateman