FUN FRIDAY: SWEET SWEATS from BCBGeneration on Vimeo.
Here’s a little something to brighten your Monday. I shot this and am in it for two seconds. Enjoy and feel free to share if you like it.
Mar
12
2012
This is what I do at work.
Mar
5
2012
Whatever happened to the teenage dream?
I mean this is what instagram was made for, right?
Why did I hate being a teenager so much? Being a teenager is awesome. Nothing you do matters. Nothing. Teenagers, I’m not trying to put you down; on the contrary. I’m trying to empower you. Don’t you realize how awesome it is when nothing you do matters? You can do anything. Anything! Go to school, don’t fuck up your grades, and then do whatever the hell you want. Stay out late on a school night. Wear something stupid. Be ignorant. Don’t try to be an adult. Being an adult kind of sucks, I’m gonna be real. There are a lot of great things about my life, like I get to legally drink (even though I still get carded which is both flattering and extremely embarrassing), I don’t have to tell my parents what I’m doing all the time, and I can basically say, “Fuck this shit, I’m an adult!”
Now here are the downsides: as an adult, drinking takes a harder toll on my body, I actually miss my parents telling me what to do because now I have to make those decisions for myself, and if I say, “Fuck this shit, I’m an adult!” I have to deal with the consequences, good or bad. And guys, my knees hurt. I’m in my twenties, not even my late twenties, and my fucking knees hurt after a workout. Which reminds me, does anyone have a good workout DVD/whatever other than The 30 Day Shred? Because The Shred works but it kills my knees every time. And as vain as I am, I don’t think it’s worth it. So yeah, your stupid knees hurt and you have to find a job and keep it because you have to pay for boring shit like bills, and sometimes you cry in the corner of the shower thinking, “LOLOLOLOL” in your brain. Because being an adult can be absurd.
I didn’t appreciate being a teenager because as a teenager I felt ugly, hated that I looked so young, and wished I didn’t have to go to school. Those were my problems. Those aren’t problems. Those are, “Shut up you’re not ugly, one day you will LOVE being told you look young, and get your shitty body to school you idiot it’s a lot easier than real life.”
Teenagers: have some fucking fun. I mean it. If not for you, then for Uncle Almie.
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Mar
2
2012
“What’s Your Favorite Frinkle?”
Gasp! I’ve been animated “Waking Life” style. What’s YOUR favorite Frinkle??
Feb
27
2012
MAX LANDIS AND APOCALYPSTICK WANT YOU…
…To send us — Max Landis, screenwriter of “Chronicle” and Almie Rose, of the blog you’re reading right now — your questions on dating, relationships, sex, social etiquette – we’ll tackle them all! In case you’re not familiar, Max and I do a web show where we take readers’ questions and answer them as best we can. So send em on over to my formspring.
See our previous videos here.
Feb
25
2012
Classic Videos: FUN TIMES WITH APOCALYPSTICK!
Who needs drugs when you have a paper shredder?
Feb
23
2012
Boobs.
So I’m watching Whitney (yeah, so what, I watch Whitney sometimes, the parts with Whitney are funny, the part with her friends not so much) and the episode is about her wearing fake boobs and how her boyfriend reacts. The episode is also about her friends being annoying and stupid but again, the interesting part is about Whitney. So Whitney wears this bra that makes her A cup a double D. And considering that Whitney is already so thin and tall and pretty, this makes her look like even more of a model, but I don’t think we’re supposed to think that way. I think we’re supposed to see Whitney as an avergae modern day gal, like a foul mouthed Mary Tyler Moore for the twitter era.
P.S. Whitney.
So anyway Whitney now has big fake boobs and this intrigues her boyfriend. And Whitney is insulted because he says that when she wears them, it’s like he “gets to be with someone else.” Our dear heroine Whitney says something like, “Why can’t you accept me for who I am?” and “Admit it, you wish I had bigger boobs” and earlier in the episode when she first gets the bra she says, “Why does everyone hate women?” which I thought was a really great line. Her boyfriend retaliates that she wishes he were different too, like why can’t he be more like Don Draper? Because she likes Mad Men and talks about Jon Hamm a lot.
The point of the episode was, if we could change our partners, would we? Or do we like them for who they are, flawed and all? And also, do women need to have big boobs?
I’m at the point where I’m happy with my boobs, even though they’re Whitney sized. It’s all about the quest for abs anyway. I’ve heard from lots of guys (and not from me asking, just from life) that they don’t really care about the size of the boobs they just care about boobs in general. Boobs are great!
P.S. Boobs.
Anyway, using this show as an example, at what point did Whitney’s boyfriend realize, “Oh wait, my girlfriend has small boobs” and decide it wasn’t a big deal? In between the time when you started dating your sig other and the time when you became a long term item, when do you come to terms with something and accept it or decide that it needs to be changed or you’re done?
And no, this isn’t based on me or anything going on in my life. This is all Whitney.
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Feb
21
2012
“Monkey Find, Monkey Kill”
I’m not in this brand new episode of LaDiDa Music Videos BUT it’s one of my favorites. It stars Nicole Daddona, my personal It Girl, and an evil toy monkey. If you haven’t subscribed already, do it now. It’s worth it. Or not whatever it’s your life. No but do it.
